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Joke of the Day

"I've done some pretty stupid things while I've been drunk, but in alcohol's defense, I've done a lot of pretty stupid things sober, too."

"What do you call a loaf baked in a zoo? Bread in captivity."

"[in bed] ""No, I'm serious Amy. If this were a buddy cop movie would you try to avenge my murder even after the Chief took your gun & badge?"""

"What's hairy dangerous and only surfs the Net when there's a full moon? The www.erewolf."

"I've been in Wisconsin for ten pounds. That means one week for those of you who have never visited Wisconsin."

"A man walks up to God and asks, ""are you an ass man or a titties man?"" He replies, ""I'm a soul man"""

"Happy and Sad An old man says to his wife, ""Honey, there is no possible way to feel both happiness and sadness at the same time."" The wife says, ""Out of all your brothers, you have the biggest dick."""

"You'll NEVER guess who I came across the other day... your MOM!"

"If April showers bring May flowers, what do Mayflowers bring? Genocide."

"Q: Why are people in Arkansas having peanut butter and jelly for Thanksgiving this year? A: They've been having turkey for years."