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Joke of the Day

"If Amy Winehouse complained a lot... She'd be Amy Whinehouse"

"Just got back in the USA, I heard something about a party here? I don't know, there's a song about it and everything."

"i jacked off into the toilet and tried to flush but the cum seems to always stay afloat..... well,what do you know...... I got great swimmers!!!"

"Am I the only one who wants to write ""Over"" at the end of my tweets? Over."

"What do you get if you cross a constable with a computer? PC Plod."

"Pizza jokes are all about delivery."

"My Wife walked in on me having sex with our daughter. I dont know what she was more angry about, me having sex with our daughter or that the abortion clinic let me keep the foetus"

"I'm planning on releasing a fragrance based off of suffering. I'm going to call it ""Eau de Humanity"""

"A dyslexic man walks into a bra."

"""Iowa man arrested after fight over peanut butter and jelly sandwiches"" - I'm just gonna assume this is 1 of you guys"