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Joke of the Day

"I still don't understand why people say marriage is so hard when I've successfully completed 2 of them..."

"Does the baby have access to my ribs? It feels like they're bars and she's an old timey prisoner with a tin mug"

"Come to my 127.0.0.1 and I'll give you sudo access."

"My grandpa dropped this one on me over the phone. I'll see you in church, make sure you sit by the window."

"People need to stop asking me about my 5 year outlook I don't have 2020 vision"

"Why did 6 and 8 dislike 7? They thought 7 was pretty odd."

"How did they cure the swine flu? With oinkment."

"What's long hard and shitty at the end? One of John Doe joke."

"David Cameron joke! They say David Cameron is a one term Prime Minister. That term is of course 'cunt'."

"Unfortunately, this month's Psychics Club meeting is cancelled... ... due to unforeseen circumstances."