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Joke of the Day

"When you get pulled over by a cop... A cop pulled me over and said ""Papers..."" So I said ""Scissors!"" and drove off ; )"

"When Harry Potter ejaculates, it's HP sauce For those who don't know, [HP sauce](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/HP_Sauce) is a brown sauce sold in the UK."

"I remember... when I used to be really nostalgic. Those were the days."

"Corny Jokes... ..have no stalk in them."

"Growing a beard is the closest I've come to caring for an animal."

"If it wasn't for venetian blinds... It would be curtains for us all!"

"Rap videos are completely unrealistic. Nobody has that many friends"

"What's the difference between a spitter and a swallower? 10 lbs of pressure on the back of the head."

"Our team is doing so badly that ""Manager of the Month"" isn't an award. It's an appointment!"