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Joke of the Day

"What did the hat say to the tie? You just hang here, Ill go on ahead"

"I'm not a lucky man I once gambled on a couch and won a baby"

"How many psychologists does it take to change a lightbulb? One, but the lightbulb has to WANT to change."

"What's the difference between a crow and a raven? All birds have tail feathers that help them fly called pinions. Crows have 3 pinions and ravens have 4. The difference is just a matter of a pinion."

"What's the difference between a politician and a bucket of shit? The bucket."

"I heard some new music today and I can't be sure if I liked it or not. It was called Schrodinger Scat."

"What does a bartender give you when you need the feeling of a strong drink, but you're not allowed ton consume alcohol? Xanax since he's a Bartender"

"I was wondering where my new axe had gone... ...Then it hit me."

"What driver doesn't have a license? A screw driver."

"When my boss asks me if I can ""take a stab at this"", I always hope she'll point to that coworker we all hate."