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Joke of the Day

"Him: I like meatier girls. Me: I killed the dinosaurs. Him: What? Me: What?"

"Why hasn't Nintendo released a Mario themed basketball video game? Because Japan isn't good at basketball."

"This may sound like a rape joke if you ask me Oh wait you don't have to."

"If you want an adrenaline rush, you should go camping... It's in tents."

"Where does Noah store his bees? The ark-hives."

"I knew the psychic was a fraud the second she accepted my check"

"JESUS: today im going to walk on water JUDAS: NO DONT-- [jesus walks onto ocean. entire ocean turns to wine. all ocean life dies instamtly]"

"A cat goes to the vet with a septic infection. Hello Pus, said the vet."

"By the way it was me who set those sheep free to roam around the courtroom during your divorce hearing. In case ewe were wandering."

"Thanks for telling me what BOGO means... It means a great deal to me."