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Joke of the Day

"How can you tell if a Redditor is an extrovert? During any conversation he's looking at YOUR shoes."

"When grocery shopping, I only buy foods that can also be used as a weapon. Cantaloupe is a good example of this."

"I've started calling my penis the bullet. It's really small and comes really fast."

"If I ever get a tummy tuck I'm going to ask the surgeon to make a little pocket below my navel so I'll always have a place for my iPod."

"A man is buying an apple, a banana, and two eggs. The female cashier says: ""You must be single."" The man answers: ""Wow, how did you know?"" Cashier: ""Because you're ugly."""

"When does a non-believer become a dirty kafir infidel? When he leaves the room."

"I guess ""Victoria's Secret Angel"" does sound better than ""flightless pantybird"""

"Thanks for putting out Mom! ~ everyone. Happy Mother's Day!"

"What device does Mario use to communicate with the dead? A Lou-ouija board."

"I can't stop watching this TV series on the history of the Black Monks It's been addicting"