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Joke of the Day

"""Is this the burn ward?"" ""Yes can I help you?"" ""You need to admit my mom, I told her that her casserole was ass-erole."" ""Stop calling here."""

"Psychologists who have examined Oscar Pistorius say that he is at risk of suicide. Especially if he confuses himself with a burglar."

"My 8 told me he likes Skillrex because it sounds like what Transformers would sound like if they quit saving the world and formed a band."

"Teacher: If you have five haystacks in one corner five in another and two in another how many would you have ? Pupil: One big haystack !"

"The only thing scarier than getting a call from an unknown number, is when that number doesn't leave a voicemail."

"Why were the bakers hands brown? He kneaded a poo"

"My dad used to warn me about anal He said ""Son, this might hurt a bit."""

"Jenny McCarthy was wearing a jacket and gloves in Time Square on New Years Eve. I didn't know she believes in the theory of weather."

"Why does Kim Jong Un love books? Because he is the Supreme Reader."

"There are three types of people in this world Those who can count And those who cannot count"