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Joke of the Day

"You can lead a human to knowledge.... but you can't make them think."

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"How do you get down off of an elephant? You dont. You get down off a goose."
"My co worker just asked if I could help file some documents. I said I was working on a huge project while she watched me play solitaire."
"I like my women how I like my bicycles, chained up in the garage."
"How does Super Mario contact the dead? He uses a Luigi board."
"Tweeting with an egg avatar is like showing up to a job interview in a sweatsuit."
"Swallowing these multivitamins is like swallowing the Titanic Need a little water to wash it down."
"College students... Thief: ""Give me all your money !"" Me: ""I'm a college student..."" Thief: ""... Have some of mine."""
"What language does a homosexual jew speak? .....Heblew"
"If you know how many calories are in your donut, you're not eating it right."