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Joke of the Day

"Some people say America is obese, but I blame our flag. Everyone knows that horizontal stripes make you look fatter."

"I once submitted 10 puns to a contest to see which one would win. No pun in 10 did."

"I've just made an abortion. I'm not kidding."

"A very large woman was walking her dog... and as she walked by I said ""nice pig,"" she looked at me with a puzzled face and said ""that's no pig, it's my dog."" I replied with ""I was talking to the dog."""

"If breaking a mirror is seven years of bad luck. What would have to break to give you 18? a condom"

"What did the Japanese chef say when his mother died? Well, that's the edamame."

"What do you call a Hispanic guy's quest to get gender reassignment surgery? Manuel Trans Mission"

"What do you get when you make a scarf out of a cat? A Neko."

"If you're smoking weed on the way to Home Depot I can predict your future, in 2 hrs you're going back to Home Depot."

"What is the most popular band in Japan? Fall Out Boy"