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Joke of the Day

"My girlfriend and I were talking about pets, she said she'd like to get a manatee. I just laughed and said, ""Two sugars, please."""

Next Joke
 
"I got in a fight with a coworker yesterday... He struck me as a very offended man."
"Adulthood is about being able to eat cookies for breakfast, but not doing it because you already ate all the cookies."
"I have a voluntary version of Tourette's."
"What is a Jewish delima? A free ham."
"I'm starting a new abortion clinic and naming it... Scrambled Eggs."
"Midwife [handing my baby]: make sure you support his head Me: that's a really great, floppy little head you've got there. Well done"
"The police arrested two kids yesterday, one was drinking battery acid, the other was eating fireworks. The police charged one and let the other one off."
"FOUND: IPod Touch 4G, 32GB, white. Must be able to match the naked pics I found in the photos."
"I've never wished death on anyone. It's the absolute *last* thing anyone should have to go through."