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Joke of the Day

"I'm 43 yrs old and still buying pot at a mall parking lot. On the flip side, Mom is 70 and still selling it there."

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"A redneck girl is sucking off her black power boyfriend. What's her favorite song? I'm Going Through the Big D and Don't Mean Dallas"
"This year's Oscars are just like Zero Dark Thirty. We know how it's gonna end, but let's all pretend it's suspenseful."
"I NEED JOKES ABOUT TREES Don't ask questions, I just really need non-offensive tree jokes and fast! Thank you for your help!!!"
"I went to handshake someone and he basically just gripped my thumb and I'm never going to be popular"
"What is E.T. short for? It has little legs."
"*takes a picture of food for Instagram* Food: delete it"
"What do you call a teacher that doesn't fart in public? A private tutor (tooter) Heard it from a guy on the street selling newspapers in front of the art institute in chicago."
"Michael Jackson's last words ""Take me to the children's hospital."""
"What's brown and rhymes with Snoop? Dr.Dre."