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Joke of the Day

"""Condoms, please."" ""Do you need a bag for that?"" ""No, she's not that ugly."""

Next Joke
 
"The rules of weed do not work for pussy.. If you can smell it across the room, it's not the good shit."
"The Hamburglar burgled HAM. If he stole burgers, he'd be called the Hamburgerburglar."
"I injured my back in Egypt... and had to see a Cairo-practor"
"Why did King Kong join the army? To learn about gorilla warfare."
"Just spent a nice relaxing hour on facebook, writing ""you Two look fantastic!!"" on all weekend selfies with three girls or more in it."
"My coworker was like ""I love kids! Can't finish a whole one by myself though hahaha!"" And I was just like wow I could easily eat like 5."
"Drying out wet fireworks in the oven is not a good idea. Trust me on this"
"Do people who criticize the presidents daughter for smoking pot forget that the last Republican vice president shot his friend in the face."
"I was reading about two ships that collided at sea. One was carrying red paint and the other blue paint and all the sailors were marooned."