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Joke of the Day

"The base is under assault! NaCl NH3"

"Why do they say ""be there or be square""? because if you are square, you are not around."

"Hey guys. What's the most reassuring thing about the Riot Police presence in Hong Kong right now? *Their guns are probably made in China.* yuk yuk yuk"

"Dear Parents If you want to find out where your Son/Doughter is in the house, Simply turn off WI-FI and Wait"

"Steve Jobs isn't really dead The nurses are just holding him the wrong way [Source](http://sickipedia.org/joke/view/1108293)"

"What do you get when you have rough sex in an ice cream parlour? A sore bae."

"How do they tie things down on the space station? They use astro knots."

"I just took enough Vicodin to kill a medium-sized Chipmunk. RIP Roy. Roy's the hypothetical Chipmunk. I named him. Has anyone seen my legs??"

"A termite walks into a bar... He says, ""Is the bar tender here?"""

"Q: Why couldn't the pirate play cards? A: Because he was sitting on the deck !"