47769

Joke of the Day

"What can you tell your dog but not your girlfriend? Sit down and beg There are a million answers to this. Come on reddit, make my day better."

"Why are people into Flat Earth Theory? Because it's edgy."

"When Scarlett Witch was at the Avengers HQ... you could say she needed...adult super Vision."

"I'll never sleep with a golfer again. The last one kept trying to use a wedge to get the ball in the hole."

"Did you know Helen Keller had a swing set? She didn't know either"

"Why No 1 likes Apple So there are some people in an electronics store and the computers are just Apple. Then someone farts and its bad,but someone says 2 bad there's no Windows"

"ISIS and I have something in common... We both get head through the use of violence and terror..."

"Asking someone out is so unpredictable. You never know exactly how they're going to say no."

"Girl, are you organized? Because I want to get on your ToDo list!"

"If you ever get cold Just stand in a corner for a bit, they're usually around 90 degrees."