47627

Joke of the Day

"A Catholic dies, and thinks he's gone to heaven ."

"Heard there were some hot deals... at the Baltimore CVS."

"Last night I masturbated over my ex-girlfriend. I know it's not right, but she's a heavy sleeper and I still have a key."

"If buttered toast always lands buttered side down and a cat always lands on its feet what would happen if you tied a pice of buttered toast on the back of a cat and dropped it?"

"The Dalai Lama Walks Into a Pizza Shop... ...and asks says, ""Can you make me one with everything?"""

"What does BBW actually stand for? Boobs below waist."

"What is more inappropriate than a 7 year old saying ""I drink coffee""? Her saying ""I drink it black, like my men"""

"I never feel guilty about eating baby carrots because it's not like adult carrots are doing anything great with their lives."

"If you date someone working for the federal government and then break up, does he become FedEx? #oksorry"

"As I was leaving home to start a new life for myself across the country my mom said"" Don't forget to write!"" I thought ""That's unlikely... It's a basic skill,isn't it?"""