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Joke of the Day

"*Hamburglar returns home with bag of hamburgers* *his wife, holding a crying baby, slaps the bag out of his hands* ""WE NEED MONEY, DAMMIT!"""

"What do you call a promise you can't keep? A campaign promise."

"After a disappointing summer, Humpty Dumpty ended up having a great fall."

"I taught my 4yo how to spell 'beer' so he'll stop bringing me Pepsi from the fridge."

"The Night Life North Korea has just announced their own time zone ...Meaning the world now has the first official Party time."

"What makes you sweat during the summer? A sweater."

"Just talking to my neighbor, I said ""your"" instead of ""you're"" AND HE DIDN'T EVEN NOTICE!!! Hahaha what an idiot!!!"

"Apparently Neil Armstrong used to tell unfunny jokes about the Moon, and follow them up with ""Ah, I guess you had to be there."""

"school is like a boner School is like a boner its long and hard, unless your Asian"

"I was going through my nieces socks and underwear. It got awkward when she started giggling"