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Joke of the Day
"What do you call a black dinosaur? Tyroneosaurus-Rex."
Next Joke
"if i don't respond to your text, it's because i fell asleep finding a dumb picture of mos def to send u in lieu of typing ""most definitely"""
"President Obama is doubling down on fighting global warming He's already sent three battalions of Marines to invade the Sun."
"Why is my girlfriend like a deep fat fryer? They're both dangerously hot and belong in the kitchen."
"Destroying the Death Star was a terrorist act. Allah Ackbar!!!!!"
"I always wanted to be a plumber when I grew up but in the end it was just a pipe dream."
"This is your brain. *holds up a brain* And this is your brain on drugs. *holds up a brain wearing a weird hat and a scarf*"
"I'm coming out of the closet. Not that! I mean her husband finally left for work."
"A vagina is like the weather. Once its wet, it's time to go inside."
"Him: Can I have a bite of your dessert? Me: I think we should see other people."