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Joke of the Day

"Absolutely love holding my son, I can't stop looking at him. Whoops! This is a churro. It's just a churro."

"So I looked up Jewish porn the other day... But all I found was ash to mouth."

"""Don't put it on my plate if you don't want me to eat it!"" - me to my kid, who's crying because I ate the playdoh burger he put on my plate"

"What's green with a brown tip? The cucumbers in Elton John's fridge."

"I just finished a jigsaw puzzle. It only took me six months, which is amazing considering the box says 2-4 years."

"It's not true that all black people are mistreated in America Some black people are mistreated in other countries."

"I had a friend who used to draw on her eyebrows. One day, she accidentally drew them to high. When I told her, she looked surprised."

"The five senses are touch, smell, sight, hearing, and..... It's on the tip of my tongue..."

"What did the bull say after sleeping with a transexual cow? ""That was no Miss Steak!"""

"Me: I know you from somewhere Jesus: I get that a lot Me: no I'm sure Jesus: just one of those faces Me: [holding arms out] go like this"