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Joke of the Day

"What to do when a blonde throws a grenade at you... What do you do when a blonde throws a grenade at you? Pull the pin and throw it back."

"The difference between a prostitute and drug dealer? A prostitute can wash her crack and resell it."

"What did the father of a dog family tell his son after he made a racist joke In this family we don't see colors, son."

"I'm surprisingly calm about Internet spoiling Star Wars to me. Who could believe Kylo Ren is actually vegetarian and grandson of General Akbar"

"Why do sharks only swim in salt water? (Got this is a Cracker Jack box) Because pepper water makes them sneeze!"

"My new thesaurus is terrible in fact I'd go as far to say that it's terrible"

"Christmas shopping can be so frustrating. Why don't they sell frankincense at the same stores they sell the myrrh?"

"RIP Paris Terror Attack Victims Never baguette"

"maybe if we told raccoons that the black around their eyes meant they were superheroes instead of burglars theyd stop stealing our trash"

"Sees friend from highschool. Gives friend a big hug. Refuses to let go of friend. Becomes siamese friends."