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Joke of the Day
"Whole Foods on Sunday is just a refugee camp for people with too much money."
Next Joke
"What was the most devastating thing in WW2. The environment was ruined from the gas."
"Two peanuts were walking down the street one was assaulted."
"I wish my girlfriend.... Would go down as much as Pokemon Go servers"
"Look, I'm not running a charity here, and if I was I'd be too busy embezzling money to help people."
"A black man picks up a girl from a nightclub... Back at his house, she says: ""show me what they say about black men is true..."" So he stabs her and runs off with her purse."
"ME: You're a silly sausage aren't you? SAUSAGE: [peering over spectacles] I may have acted out in my youth but that's not what defines me."
"Why did the sloths vote to keep the coal mines open? Because when it comes to energy they're conservative."
"Could someone help me decide what's more two faced... Hillary Clinton or the coin"
"I bought these shoes from a drug dealer I don't know what he laced them with but I've been tripping all day."