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Joke of the Day

"COME TO ME JOURNALBOT *Journalbot enters my study* ok write this down: Polar bears are bear ghosts. ""polargeists"" [very sad robot noises]"

"Q: Four Dallas Cowboys in a car who's driving? A: The police."

"""Shit just got real."" - God, creating the digestive system"

"What does a Cannon and Canon have in common? They both kill ships."

"Australia I told my girlfriend I've been to Australia... I kissed her sting ray down unda'"

"The average time it takes for an elderly woman to get her ringing cellphone out of her purse is 11 days."

"What do you call a competition between two assholes who like to masturbate A jerk off!"

"Farm counting A farmer had 30 cows, and 28 chickens... How many didn't?"

"Two drunks are crawling on the railroad. One says ""I'm tired of climbing this ladder, when's our floor already?"" ""No worries, I see an elevator coming."""

"gave my wife a pedicure just so I could write in my diary ""I nailed her...10 TIMES IN A ROW"". Ha ha, jokes on you, Masculinity."