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Joke of the Day

"Farm counting A farmer had 30 cows, and 28 chickens... How many didn't?"

"What's black and runny Moses Kiptanui"

"I can't decide whether to go to Australia or Thailand this year for a holiday. So I decided to weigh up the pros and cons of both. Australia has a load of Cons, but Thailand has lots of Pros."

".@LAPD My wife made hazelnut ""coffee"" with my coffee maker. Send all available units."

"What's the difference Between a dirty bus stop and a lobster with a boob job. One is a crusty bus station the other is a busty crustacean."

"I often find myself crying during sex... Probably from the pepper spray..."

"According to rom coms, I haven't met the perfect guy because I've never chased an important paper down the block in a gust of wind."

"What's the difference between a hippie chick and a pizza? I don't peel the crust off of a pizza before I eat it"

"The pope secretly came to my house. He thought it was weird that I had so many Blu-rays still in the shrink wrap. I'll get around to them!"

"Idea for a board game BONOPOLY - Similar to Monopoly, but where the streets have no name."