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Joke of the Day

"Dang girl you're so hot because you have all the physical attributes that the general media has conditioned me to find attractive."

"On a scale from 1 to 10 I tell people they're an 11. It's a fun way to let them know they don't exist and they take it as a compliment."

"What's the difference between a Catholic and a Jew? At least when a Catholic scars you for life, you might get to cum."

"What's the difference between a Chilean mining company and a Catholic priest? One gets their miners stuck in a shaft, and the other gets his shaft stuck in a minor."

"Juicing changed my life. I went from being overweight, to being overweight and owning a juicer."

"That's a really big gun in your pants. And that's how you get out of a speeding ticket."

"Relationships are mostly you apologizing for saying something hilarious"

"I went to the local zoo today There was only one dog there. It was a shih tzu."

"What is a Mexican's most favourite sport? Cross-country"

"What do you get when you mix T and C? Angry British people!"