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Joke of the Day

"Anyone want a free car? Angry bee inside but otherwise, perfect."

"Why did the baker have smelly hands? Because he needed a poo."

"What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?"

"A Drinking Problem! Math Teacher: ""If I have 5 bottles in one hand and 6 in the other hand, what do I have?"" Student: ""A drinking problem."""

"M: What do you want for dinner? H: I don't care, you decide M: Sushi? H: No, but whatever. M: Mexican? H: Nah, but your call. He's dead now"

"Why do black people have white palms? Because everyone has a little bit of good in them."

"I need to thank the guy who honked while waiting for my parking spot for inspiring me to stay & write my memoirs in this Target parking lot."

"Why did Oscar Pistorius shoot his girlfriend in the bathroom? Because he's one of the few people in World that couldn't kick down the door."

"I used to have a roommate who was always smoking in my apartment, but only with e-cigs. He died of e-cancer."

"[Interview] ""Describe yourself in one word."" Me: Lethargic."