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Joke of the Day

"a coca-cola can and a dr pepper bottle are having an emotional talk... coca-cola asked why dr pepper had been bottling up his feelings for so long!"

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"What was Bin Laden's favorite Football team? The New York Jets"
"H: Gross! Stop peeing in the shower! Me: Why? Everybody pees in the shower. H: Yeah but you're not in it right now, I am."
"You've said it before and I'll say it again -Plagiarists"
"It's starting to look like Christmas in New York A lot of the stores have trees in the window"
"Why was the Nun admitted to rehab.... Because she had a habit! I'll just show myself out"
"The original E*TRADE baby, Jaden Mills, died in an electrical fire 2 years ago."
"[to snake at news station] you can't do weather anymore ""ssswhy not?"" are we getting rain tomorrow? ""sssno"" do you see how that's confusing?"
"And so, Jesus said unto Peter ""Come forth and win yourself eternal glory"" But Peter came fifth and won himself a toaster"
"A hamburger walks into a bar... ...and the bartender says ""I'm sorry, we don't serve food here""."