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Joke of the Day

"Stupid one liners everyone should know I'll start: I recently sold my vaccum. It was just collecting dust."

"Nana said I took too much NyQuil so I laughed at her and then she turned back into a paper clip and jumped into my fave Law & Order episode."

"Do you want to know what I was for discovery channel dress up day? I dressed up as naked and afraid. I was naked everybody else was afraid."

"The other day I held the door open for a clown. I thought it was a nice jester."

"So I just asked my SO's mother the agenda for tomorrow's festivities... And my girlfriend interrupted with ""Well I'll be female""."

"Hula hoopers never seem to get anywhere... They're just going around in circles."

"A teacher was fired for not letting kids out at the end of the day unless they gave her fresh coffee. It was grounds for dismissal."

"Knock Knock Who's there ! Avery ! Avery who ? Avery time I come to your house we go through this !"

"What's a butcher's favorite city? Cleaveland"

"What did the police officer say to the white man running away with a TV? ""Sir, you dropped your receipt!"""