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Joke of the Day

"I found a stray cat today. Sadly, my dad is allergic to them so I had to put him down. At least I still have the cat for comfort."

Next Joke
 
"What is your favorite joke about women? Q: Why don't women wear watches? A: Because there is a clock on the stove."
"I saw a really funny joke on /r/Jokes a while back Quite a while back actually."
"Why was Yoda afraid of 9? Because 10 9 8"
"""Money isn't everything"" - Someone with a shitload of dough"
"Why doesn't Santa have any children? Because he only comes once a year"
"love i have been in love with the same woman for 17 years now....if my wife ever finds that out she will kill me!"
"Why does Shang Tsung always enjoy a religious song from Finland? Because it's a Finnish hymn."
"Aliens who abducted a drunk Russian gave in... and let him drive for a bit."
"NOBODY MOVE THIS IS A ROBBERY! *other robber looks over at me* dude no you can move. We talked about this. Get the money"