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Joke of the Day

"I pulled a disabled girl in the pub last night... ...the handle on her wheelchair was caught in my jacket."

"I have the best prison name Mitochondria"

"Some people just have a way with words... ...and other people ... oh ... not have way."

"Did you hear about the Mexican killer that owned trains? He had loco-motives"

"Text from my nana: ""What is a diss track?"" Don't worry about it u prune gash"

"Ever wonder why people pay so much for their electricity bill? CON Edison."

"What is the first derivative of a cow? A prime rib."

"The barman says, ""We don't serve time travellers in here."" A time traveller walks into a bar."

"I think it's nice that the vowels sometimes let ""Y"" into their crew."

"I'm pretty sure that spiders have figured out that I'm terrified of them, and have created a game to see who can make me flip out the most."