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Joke of the Day

"I visited the new aviary everyone's talking about but I think it's for the birds."

"I have to work new years eve. But I'm not upset, after work I have the rest of the year off."

"Tell me, ""everything happens for a reason"" so I know you're an idiot."

"Doctor told me I only have 6 months to live, maybe 12 if I get enough likes on Facebook."

"Ranchers are protesting over round hay bales. They claim that their horses aren't getting a square meal."

"You can get a tiny tablecloth for a DOLLHOUSE from Pottery Barn for $18.99, or I could just come over and punch you in the face for free?"

"snickers where r mah snickers"

"I'm gonna make a proctologist training video based on the Shawshank Redemption The main characters name will be Andy Dufranus"

"What did ""Nock"" say to ""K""? You can join us, as long as you stay quiet."

"Why do you never see any bugs in a church? Because they are in sects."