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Joke of the Day

"A crazy looking girl threatened to punch me because I kept playing Taylor Swift on the Jukebox. I knew she was Trouble when she walked in."

"Did you hear the one about the nympho who went fishing with 5 guys? She came home with a red snapper."

"A family walks into a r/jokes hotel and the father goes to the front desk and says ""I hope the reposts are disabled."" the guy at the desk replies ""it's all reposts here you sick fuck"""

"Why are cigarette taxes such a safe bet right now? One way or the other, there's going to be a lot of smoking over the next four years."

"What's the difference between a man's balls and Jehovah's Witnesses? There's none. They both knock on the door, but never goes in!"

"What's the difference between a tire and 365 used rubbers? One is a Goodyear and the other is a great year."

"What did the constipated mathematician do? He worked his problems out with a pencil and paper."

"Whats the derivative of Amazon? Amazon prime."

"How do you ask a tyrannosaur out to lunch? ""Tea, Rex?"""

"I don't need a football game to get drunk and scream at my television."