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Joke of the Day

"Hope they send us home early; I'm not sure how much longer I can pretend to work today."

"For not knowing what's going on, dogs sure look embarrassed when you watch them taking a dump."

"Pedophiles are basically another form of hipsters... ... they are into people before it's cool."

"The Helen Keller doll is gonna be hot this Christmas ... Wind it up and it walks off a table ..."

"What do you call an alligator wearing a vest? An investigator."

"Whats the difference between a boy scout and a jew? The boy scout returns home from the camp."

"Why is stormtrooper always late from work? He keeps missing his train"

"If you smoke a lot of cigarettes & gaze out of a window while your foot is propped up on something you can figure out pretty much anything."

"What do you call a one-eyed dinosaur? Doyouthinkhesarus (Credit goes to whoever submitted that to the Coffee News)"

"Enterprise What do the USS Enterprise and toilet paper have in common? They both keep Klingons off Uranus."