42956

Joke of the Day

"In the sentence of life, the devil may be a comma - but never let him be the period."

"What happened to the hippy chemistry teacher when he spilled his chemicals? He tripped on acid"

"Why does America have so many boasting Republicans? Because it needs some bragging rights."

"I had the weirdest dream last night. I dreamt that I was a muffler. I woke up pretty exhausted."

"What did they call the Mexican cleaning robot? Aye CaRoomba"

"Just had sex in an Apple Orchard. I came in cider."

"I phoned my boss. I said, ""I'm calling in sick tomorrow."" ""But, how do you know you're going to be ill?"" he asked. I swear, sometimes he forgets that he works in a psychic shop."

"What is the most well educated type of nut? Macademia."

"Why do I like sweet potatoes? Cuz they're yammy!!!"

"I have a Ring of *Dad Jokes* It's well rounded but not too bright"