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Joke of the Day

"What's 13 inches long, stiff, and makes a woman scream all night long? Crib-death"

"What was Hitler's favourite air vehicle? heilcopter"

"What do you call a government consisted of burglars? A thiefdom."

"Attidude Redefined for love: I can always take care of my self... But still, i want the person who can prove to me that i can't..."

"Why didn't the art thief get away? Because he didn't have to Monet to pay the Guy to make the Van Gogh."

"I'm the flower, you're the bee. Why don't you suck the sweet pollen right out of me?"

"What do you call a person who kills babies and gets paid for it? An abortion doctor."

"Man walks into a bar with a piece of tarmac.... He said "" can i have a drink and one for the road"""

"Ever hear of Henry, Santa's brown nosed reindeer? He is just as fast as Rodolph but couldn't stop as quickly."

"I only have eyes for you. We sold out of skin swaths & teeth a couple hours ago. Last few eyes are in that bucket. (50% off bruised ones.)"