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Joke of the Day
"What do you call a government consisted of burglars? A thiefdom."
Next Joke
"Q: What does Teddy Kennedy have that Bill Clinton wishes he did? A: A dead girlfriend."
"What's Beethoven's favorite fruit? Ba-na-na-naaa!"
"(Real Story) All of a sudden, my Steam language was set to Russian. I was changing it back to English, when my hand slipped. But it's okay, now. I have everything in Czech."
"How Much Did the Pirate Charge For Corn? A buck an ear"
"(Me playing guitar) 3: Daddy what's this song called? Me: Going Nowhere. 3: I know that but what's this song called? Burned by a 3yo."
"What do you get when you cross an owl with a bungee cord? My ass."
"I like to stand next to someone else's screaming baby, call an ex boyfriend, and tell him, ""We need to talk!"""
"I worry that people who say ""I'll sleep when I'm dead"" may have missed a Science class or two."
"What did the starving, homeless couple say to the nurse outside the abortion clinic? Fetus please."