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Joke of the Day

"Physicist Frank Wilczek states that there is life on other planets... Profesor Stephen Hawking maintains his position."

"The suspect was found dead with his genitals inside a jar of peanut butter... Dare I say he was... Fucking nuts."

"Water is the cure to everything in life If you need to lose weight, drink water. If you need clearer skin, drink water. If your tired of your wife, drown her."

"Apparently it's not acceptable to moan when someone is demonstrating a choke hold on you in crisis prevention training."

"There should be a.... Women's rights music group called Feminem."

"LIFE HACK: If a public restroom is locked, violently yank the door handle over and over like a gorilla and never accept that it's occupied"

"How did the dentist become a brain surgeon? His hand slipped"

"Don't die a virgin. Seriously, there are terrorists up there waiting for you."

"I feel sorry for my testicles. They can't even hang out without being judged."

"What did one beef patty say to the other beef patty? Will you be my grill friend?"