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Joke of the Day

"Local News: GREG JOHNSON, 41, ESCAPES BEING EATEN BY BEAR Bear News: FOOD NAMED GARG RUNS FROM LUNCHTIME"

"Pizza Hut: May I take your order? Me: Can you make a large pizza vegetarian? Pizza Hut: Yes, but don't ever call me vegetarian again."

"Why does Snoop Dogg carry an umbrella everywhere he goes? Fo' Drizzle!"

"Yeah, I know what my neighbors wear to bed. Not because I look in their windows; I just see them during the day at Walmart."

"I took two years of anger management courses Now I'm the manager of four brand new anger stores"

"What do mathematicians get if they stare at the roots of negative numbers for too long? Square eyes"

"If I get interviewed by a police sketch artists, my only goal will be to see how far I get before he realizes I'm making him draw a pirate."

"A Priest, Rapist, Pedophile Walks into a bar He orders a drink.."

"lawyer: ""my client claims the altercation began because - and i quote - ""he came at me sideways"" crab: ""in my defence.."""

"How many Will Ferrell's does it take to change a light bulb? One, AND IT'S NOT FUNNY!"