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Joke of the Day

"A three-legged dog walks into a saloon in the Old West A three-legged dog walks into a saloon in the Old West. He slides up to the bar and announces: ''I'm looking for the man who shot my paw.''"

"I woke my wife one night and said ""The force is awakening."" She replied, ""Not tonight Hand Solo."""

"What do you call an orgy with five black people? A threeway"

"This diet is probably gonna end in murder, but still pretty excited. I'm gonna look so skinny in my mugshot!"

"I'll have a salad but on top of a burger with cheese ""So you want a cheeseburger?"" Yes but when you bring it to me say here's your salad"

"""I V E M U R D E R E D S E V E N P E O P L E"" would be a fun eye chart for a doctor to have"

"[Friend opens Christmas present] Me: It's a lie detector Friend: Oh... I love it Me: (whispering) we'll see"

"What's gray and furry on the inside and white on the outside ? A mouse sandwich !"

"Refrigerator ice dispensers are perfect for those times when you need either zero or 5000 ice cubes."

"Did you hear about the guy that invented the door knocker? He won the ""Nobell"" prize."