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Joke of the Day

"Pretty lame how horses and dogs don't capitalize on their ability to wear 2 pairs of jean shorts at once"

"Government shutdown day 7: Electricity still works. Water is still running. No cool gangs to join yet. Worst apocalypse ever."

"[IAmA request] UPS delivery man. I hope OP delivers."

"Hey sports fans, here's my NCAA pick: bet it all on the Savannah College of Art & Design. Go Fighting Acrylics!"

"When I was a child I could go into a shop with just a pound, and come out with 3 bars of chocolate, 2 cans of coke and a magazine. But these days, fucking CCTV everywhere."

"so I saw an ad on ebay about a book on how to scam on ebay so i bought it.. It still hasn't arrived."

"What does the L in Samuel L Jackson stand for? Motherfucker"

"I have a strange attraction to bananas. I don't know why, I just find it apeeling."

"How big was the ant when it knocked over the table? giANT!!"

"Did you know most baking companies are family owned & operated... they're all in bread!"