4183

Joke of the Day

"What seperates black people and white people? The bars. Shoutout to my bud Treyvon for this joke from almost 7 years ago."

"Being engaged Daddy what does being engaged mean? Son It's like getting a bike for Christmas but not being able to ride it til Easter."

" My friend's dog died the other day so I surprised her by going out and getting her an identical dog. She was furious, she said *""what am I supposed to do with two dead dogs?""*"

"Hurricanes should have scary names that instill a proper sense of alarm. Names like GOLTOG HARVESTER OF SOULS or Britni."

"What do you call a woman rolling around on a beach? Sandy"

"People are always asking me why I named my pet newt 'Tiny' It's because he's my newt. ^minute ^^means ^^^small"

"NSFW why did the redneck cross the road...? Because his dick was stuck in the chicken."

"Heavy metal is not intimidating to me because half of the time it's just the plot of Lord Of The Rings yelled over guitar solos."

"Why do gay men get so much hate? Because sometimes, they're fucking assholes."

"Me: My body is a temple Personal Trainer: But what about all the food and wine and parties? Me: It's a temple to Dionysus"