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Joke of the Day

"Duck Joke A duck walks into a bar. The ducks say, ""1 beer please. And put it on my bill."" I'll be here all week"

"Apple should make a sarcasm font and call it the iRoll."

"Girlfriend left a note on the fridge ""this isn't working, you take everything too literally"". She'll be so happy when she sees the new one."

"Why don't Brits like revolving doors? A: Because they can't hold it for the next person."

"It must be hard to send Barack Obama a Thank You card without sounding sarcastic."

"If the quiz made you a little quizzical, what is the test going to make you? Really fucking confused."

"Annoying guy trying to hit on me: This is like a scene from a romantic movie. Me: Yeah, I'm the iceberg and you're the Titanic. #Queen"

"What did the double dick guy say when the tailor asked him if he dresses right or left? Yes."

"What do you call The Bear who loves philosophy? winnie the Philosopooh"

"I moved to Australia, I've never been so appreciated! I've had so many offers to ""Get F**ked!""... I have the pick of the litter!!"