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Joke of the Day

"Yes, people who exercise live longer. But those extra years are spent...umm...excercising!"

"Which web developer enjoys finding bugs? A spider!"

"I used to never give a shit, but my attitude is improving. Now I don't give two shits."

"When I draw a fish I always.... ... Draw it to scale"

"Ever hear the one about the deaf guy? Neither did he."

"When I found out the murderer dismembered the victim, It really tore me into pieces."

"Why didn't the American get the burger? ...because the heart attack got him first."

"Yuppie cannibals shop at Whole Dudes."

"I farted on an elevator, it was wrong on so many levels. From /r/PeterL"

"How do you get your dog to come? Fuck it."