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Joke of the Day
"How do you have a party in space?! YOU PLANET! :D"
Next Joke
"Why hasn't a phone that charges itself just by scrolling the screen ever been invented? What are our scientists doing?"
"Are you from Iraq? Because I wanna see you Baghdad ass up"
"Internet Explorer: so about last night Me: Oh, i used you for flash. IE: Are we back together, am i your default? Me: don't make this weird"
"Common Core"
"[girlfriend talking to me but I can't hear her over crunch of my cereal] ""I think we should see other people"" Yeah sure thing, babe"
"I'd like to give a shout out Shout out to all the people wondering what the opposite of in is."
"How many dislexic mods does it take to screw a lightbulb ? [Remodve]"
"My food pyramid is a cup of coffee sitting on a pack of cigarettes."
"What do you call someone who spends the whole time on their phone whenever you hang out? A phoney friend!"