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Joke of the Day

"Being a parent means enthusiastically clapping for a lot of mediocre stuff. It's like being a Coldplay fan."

"The right response to ""I'm a bit tied up at the moment"" isn't ""what are you wearing?"" Apparently."

"Why Batman never joke into comedy. One rule: NO KILLING"

"Bartender: ""Do you want a drink, miss?""nnMe: ""What are my choices?""nnBartender: ""Yes or No."""

"My mom is the most hip and tech savvy person I know! She needs every possible search toolbar conceivable so the internet can keep up with her!"

"I don't use my power for good or evil. Mainly, I use it to watch TV, microwave food, and charge my phone."

"Did you know the first sniper was a Mexican? Juan shot, Juan kill."

"My all time favorite lawyer joke. Q: What's the difference between a porcupine and a BMW full of lawyers? A: The porcupine has the pricks on the outside."

"Food trucks: Because the problem with most grilled cheese sandwiches is you don't spend 20 minutes breathing exhaust."

"LOOKING FOR awful pi jokes! Just found out my friend hates them. Please give me your worst pi day/pi jokes!"