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Joke of the Day

"If trump gets elected can we make a show similar to the apprentice but when Trump says ""your fired"" he sends a nuclear missile at a country."

"Forbidden fruit creates many jams."

"I think I must have a leather allergy because whenever I wake up with my shoes on I have a headache."

"What's white and fuzzy and lives high up in the trees? A Meringue - a - tan."

"The Bartender replies, ""Sorry, but we don't serve particles faster than light"" A Neutrino walks into a bar"

"What's the difference between a communist and a feminist? The communist wants equality"

"The cats told me the reason we only have one life is because we're too stupid to handle nine lives. I believe this is true."

"MOM ITS NOT A DOLLHOUSE IM PRETENDING TO BE A GIANTE THATS TERRORIZING A FAMILY GOSH *waits for mom to leave* and im makig them have tea"

"I don't know how to tell people this... But I want to be a translator."

"Told girl on flight she was pretty and she replied ""Tell me something I don't know."" So i asked if she remembered the quadratic formula."