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Joke of the Day

"French Joke Anyone see the French Military Rifle on eBay? It's never been shot and only dropped once!"

"You know what I don't get? Jobs."

"Why can't I think of a word that means something really good or really bad depending on how you use it in a sentence? Fuck!"

"*pours a shaker of salt into the ocean* You're free now"

"I got kicked out of the chorus line I was with. I just couldn't stay in sequins."

"Somebody stole my mood ring today. I don't know how I feel about that."

"Did you know that 37.8% of all statistics are made up?"

"What's a pedophile's favorite food? I'm not sure, I only watch the children eat."

"When my Mom found out I had asthma she sent me to a camp for Asthmatic children. It was so much fun.. singing songs around the Humidifire. ( yes I know how I spelt it )"

"Cantaloupe... or Wontaloupe?"