40555

Joke of the Day

"When you msg me @ 9:30am w/ just ""Morning,"" don't be shocked when I wait till 12:00pm & respond w/ ""Noon."" Seriously, what did ya expect?"

"What does a libertarian apparition say to the cops? ""Am I free to ghost?"""

"What did the art major say to the law major? ""Would you like fries with that?"""

"Why is it so difficult for women to find a man who is sensitive, caring, and good looking? All of those guys already have boyfriends."

"Good cop: frisks you Bad cop: takes his time"

"I'm pretty sure my electrician supports LGBT rights. Just the other day I heard him talking about his transister."

"It's with great tragedy that I report my blonde next door neighbour tried to kill her toy poodle. She tried putting batteries in it."

"The creator of throat lozvenges died and i went to his funeral no coffin there"

"What do people do when a chemist dies? They barium."

"It must be 1929... Because my econ homework has me in a severe depression."