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Joke of the Day

"I bought a pair of Meatloaf underwear today.. On the front they say 'I would do anything for love' and on the back they say 'But I wont do that!'"

"Which drink makes a Gorilla feel tipsy? An ape-ricot sour!"

"Chuck Norris doesn't step on toes. Chuck Norris steps on necks."

"A poltergeist was moving furniture around the house, and I really love what he's done with the place."

"I like my women the way I like my coffee Ground up and in the freezer."

"My teacher in first grade said I was stupid for ""wanting to be a T-Rex"" when I grew up but she died last year so who's the stupid one now?"

"Spoil any movie by telling ur friend ""Ice Cube dies"" before they watch it. They'll be waiting for Ice Cube to appear and die the whole time"

"my cat: *hacking up a hairball* my german neighbor: holy shit that cat is talking"

"Somewhere in Africa, a bunch of orphans are about to be running around in confederate flag shirts."

"I would submit a chemistry joke But all the chemistry jokes argon"