4053

Joke of the Day

"No matter how angry you get about something... ... you can't any angrier than a midget with a yo-yo."

"My ex is like Hurricane Katrina... She fucked New Orleans too."

"[Blackstreet Bakery] Me: [watching the baker kneading dough] ""I love the way you work it"" Baker: ""No diggity?"" Me: ""Baguette up."""

"I'm on a pepperoni pizza cleanse."

"Why do men like Haunted Bees? boobees ! :D I'll show myself out."

"Today a girl said she recognized me from our vegetarian club, But I'm pretty sure I've met herbivore."

"Willie Nelson died today.. Yeah he was playing on the road again.."

"The instructions for this tent is just a picture of a husband yelling at his wife, that's weird."

"VOTERS: we want to give a boat a ridiculous name UK: no VOTERS: we want to break up the EU and trash the world economy UK: fine"

"Why should we elect Gabe Newell as President of the United States? So there won't be a World War III."