40404

Joke of the Day

"A Jewish son asks his father for fifty dollars.. The father responds, ""forty dollars? What do you need thirty dollars for?"""

"What's the one good thing about a pedophile? They drive slow through school zones."

"I love the way everyone who uses hand sanitizer looks like they're hatching some kind of evil plan."

"I asked God for a bike,... I asked God for a bike, but I know God doesn't work that way. So I stole a bike and asked for forgiveness."

"16 year olds can vote in Scotland. That's ok because they've been drinking since they were 9 and understand disillusionment."

"Why are Skeleton's so calm? Because nothing gets under their skin."

"A Roman walks into a bar... He holds up 2 fingers and says ""Five beers please."""

"So there I was... ...balls deep in a man's ass. He turns around and asks ""Hey, can I have a reach-around?"" So I asked, ""What are you, gay?"""

"Whoever named the White House and the Pentagon also probably named oranges."

"Divorce Mickey - I want a divorce Minnie - Are you fucking crazy? Mickey - No.. I'm fucking Daisy!"